Left Hip

The left hip turned out to be worse then the right hip.

Though the MRI (with no contrast) did not show anything wrong, no labrum tear, the suspicion based on the pain, the location and the right hip led us to believe it was indeed the same story on the left side. MRI’s don’t always show (or any imaging) the real picture. It can miss something, not show something, or not provide the true depth of the problem.

The decision was made to do arthroscopy on the left hip following my response to a left hip cortisone injection and an injection to my lumbar spine. The injection in the hip made me feel like I was ok and could bear weigh – BRIEFLY.

Late October 2019 I was operated. The surgeon said the tear was really bad and worse then the right side. He stitched the labrum shut and was cautiously optimistic about my recovery and the fact that the back could still be a factor of the pain.

He was right. Recovery was very hard. I couldn’t walk on my left leg once I was allowed to start bearing weight. I couldn’t do it!! It was frightening and emotional. I hadn’t been through a major accident to cause me not to know how to walk. I was operated. Though I couldn’t bear weight and walk right prior to surgery, it was never a thought that I would not be able to walk post surgery.

PT was tough! Around 4 weeks post-op, I was taught how to begin to bear weight on the left hip by the PT himself. The folks on the floor weren’t capable of managing my scenario and I needed to be under someone’s wing. By the time I saw the surgeon at 2 month’s post-op on December 23, 2019, I said I was doing great! I was very happy. I felt great! I believe I feel better than I ever have all my life; possibly pre-pregnancy of my son but definitely post-pregnancy of him in December 1997. I was walking. I was off my crutches as I was supposed to be at this point. I was not on any meds. I was happy and setting bars for my recovery and plans for my future.

December 27, 2019 – my fateful day!

I went to PT and said I felt good. I felt like I was out of the woods; possibly at the edge of the woods. My PT worked on me and pulled on the leg, the operated leg, to create space. He pulled on both legs but my left leg adjusted out of the socket and back in. OMG!!!!! I gulped.

I had told him before I DON’T LIKE THIS and please don’t do it.

I was told it is necessary to create space in between the hip joint/socket. My heart stopped as it always did when this was done pre both surgeries and post surgeries. BUT, in this particular case, why would he pull on a leg where the hip was sewn shut?!?! 2 month’s post-op and the leg is pulled to create space in a place that was sewn shut.

We went through my exercises. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. He added the shuttle press which seemed to go ok. Then he challenged me to balance myself laying on the big blow up ball while lifting one leg at a time. I CAN’T DO IT! I CAN’T DO IT! NO. I WON’T DO IT. I CAN’T DO IT.

I was nudged to do it being told this is the only way I’ll know what I’m capable of and can or can’t do. NO. I CAN’T. He showed me. NO. I CAN’T DO IT. Finally, giving over to him (STUPIDLY!), I did it BUT I COULDN’T DO IT. I broke a sweat. My body freaked out. I couldn’t do it. He saw this and said “well now we know you can’t.”

The session was over and I left. I got in the car with my son and we drove back to Brooklyn. We stopped in Carroll Gardens so my son couldn’t get his eyes checked and his contacts renewed. We nabbed a car spot outside because it was early. It was about 11:30am. I said let’s get something to eat because we have to kill time until you can see your eye doctor. We were early for his 1pm and they couldn’t see him yet. We walked a few blocks. On the return, we were walking, mind you we were walking slowly because walking was still new to me. I was careful with my steps and walked slowly holding my son’s arm.

As I took one step forward with my left leg, a shock of what felt like electricity came out from the hip and to my groin. I yelped. I was shocked. I had pain and immediately loss of strength. I was frightened! My son helped me back to the car where I sat feeling odd sensations in my hip, groin and radiating to my thigh/down my side of the thigh. Fuck!!!! This can’t be good. This isn’t happening. Let’s get me home to rest in bed.

I messaged my PT who said I probably agitated a spot that wasn’t healed. I iced the hip. I put heat on the hip. I took Advil. NOTHING HELPED. On Saturday morning, I woke up feeling the same. NO! This will change. I’ll rest all day. I’ll stay in bed. It will go away.

Sunday, I woke up and the pain wasn’t as bad. The weakness remained. I was not the same. The strength I gained was lost. I sent an email to the surgeon updating him on the events and inquiring on next steps. This was the week of New Year’s. The surgeon was on holiday. His PA called me and said to rest, ice, and prescribed Naproxen. I was schedule to see the surgeon following the holiday week on January 6, 2020.

Following this date, my pain only escalates. My ability to get back on the hip proves impossible. My body and health decline.

I’m reduced to constant daily stress, crying and worry about my situation, my life, my livelihood.

It gets way worse for me all around.